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Autor Téma: FUN jak ma byt  (Přečteno 1435596 krát)

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Offline Rimmsi - Hadia

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5205 kdy: 20.02 2014, 13:14:20 »
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precitajte si user reviews :D

http://www.amazon.com/Haribo-Gummy-Candy-Sugarless-5-Pound/dp/B000EVQWKC/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top

Oh man...words cannot express what happened to me after eating these. The Gummi Bear "Cleanse". If you are someone that can tolerate the sugar substitute, enjoy. If you are like the dozens of people that tried my order, RUN!

First of all, for taste I would rate these a 5. So good. Soft, true-to-taste fruit flavors like the sugar variety...I was a happy camper.

BUT (or should I say BUTT), not long after eating about 20 of these all hell broke loose. I had a gastrointestinal experience like nothing I've ever imagined. Cramps, sweating, bloating beyond my worst nightmare. I've had food poisoning from some bad shellfish and that was almost like a skip in the park compared to what was going on inside me.

Then came the, uh, flatulence. Heavens to Murgatroyd, the sounds, like trumpets calling the demons back to Hell...the stench, like 1,000 rotten corpses vomited. I couldn't stand to stay in one room for fear of succumbing to my own odors.

But wait; there's more. What came out of me felt like someone tried to funnel Niagara Falls through a coffee straw. I swear my sphincters were screaming. It felt like my delicate starfish was a gaping maw projectile vomiting a torrential flood of toxic waste. 100% liquid. Flammable liquid. NAPALM. It was actually a bit humorous (for a nanosecond)as it was just beyond anything I could imagine possible.

AND IT WENT ON FOR HOURS.

I felt violated when it was over, which I think might have been sometime in the early morning of the next day. There was stuff coming out of me that I ate at my wedding in 2005.

I had FIVE POUNDS of these innocent-looking delicious-tasting HELLBEARS so I told a friend about what happened to me, thinking it HAD to be some type of sensitivity I had to the sugar substitute, and in spite of my warnings and graphic descriptions, she decided to take her chances and take them off my hands.

Silly woman. All of the same for her, and a phone call from her while on the toilet (because you kinda end up living in the bathroom for a spell) telling me she really wished she would have listened. I think she was crying.

Her sister was skeptical and suspected that we were exaggerating. She took them to work, since there was still 99% of a 5 pound bag left. She works for a construction company, where there are builders, roofers, house painters, landscapers, etc. Lots of people who generally have limited access to toilets on a given day. I can't imagine where all of those poor men (and women) pooped that day. I keep envisioning men on roofs, crossing their legs and trying to decide if they can make it down the ladder, or if they should just jump.

If you order these, best of luck to you. And please, don't post a video review during the aftershocks.

PS: When I ordered these, the warnings and disclaimers and legalese were NOT posted. I'm not a moron. Also, not sure why so many people assume I'm a man. I am a woman. We poop too. Of course, our poop sparkles and smells like a walk in a meadow of wildflowers. Thanks for all the great comments. I've been enjoying reading them and so glad that the horror show I experienced from snacking on these has at least made some people smile.



fakt mazec :D

Offline Pinata

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5206 kdy: 20.02 2014, 17:32:20 »
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Jak takove "hovna" muze nekdo vubec cist.. :D

Offline Hypiik

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5207 kdy: 28.02 2014, 14:36:34 »
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Offline Hypiik

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5208 kdy: 02.03 2014, 19:01:20 »
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Offline Hypiik

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5209 kdy: 04.03 2014, 14:40:28 »
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Offline Kaylen

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5210 kdy: 09.03 2014, 12:57:47 »
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Offline Arucard

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5211 kdy: 10.03 2014, 19:09:30 »
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uz sa to da predobjednat. datac 45 eur. samotny char boost je za 50

Offline Kudlas

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5212 kdy: 14.03 2014, 15:37:48 »
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Udiskutuju te k smrti greedy biatch!
„If you fuck with the internet, the internet fucks RIGHT BACK.“

Offline Artynko

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5213 kdy: 14.03 2014, 16:09:09 »
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hahah to je epik

Offline Kudlas

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5214 kdy: 15.03 2014, 00:57:57 »
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hahah to je epik
porad si rikam PROC? :D
Udiskutuju te k smrti greedy biatch!
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Offline Chvostiq

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5215 kdy: 18.03 2014, 16:31:11 »
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"uchylarna to je... at dou doprdele s 2.actem.... na hell me tam bombardujou porat ty blby vosy.. uz me to sere... na to nemam nervy.... nevim v cem je zabava porat chcipat.... vyjebana hra" (c) Azziz

Offline Rimmsi - Hadia

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5216 kdy: 19.03 2014, 18:08:27 »
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Offline Pinata

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5217 kdy: 19.03 2014, 20:34:17 »
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8s-oW1rm4ZY

WTF .. xD

Jak se tam nakonci lekne ty lepenky ? :DDD too je moc :D
« Poslední změna: 19.03 2014, 20:40:32 od Pinata »

Offline Rimmsi - Hadia

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5218 kdy: 19.03 2014, 21:46:43 »
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WTF .. xD

Jak se tam nakonci lekne ty lepenky ? :DDD too je moc :D

to je epic uplne cele. co me fakt ale dostalo :

"Je to takový špatno-dobrý..."
"To je akcko a to my Češi dobře známe, protože s tím bojujeme ve válkách a tak""
"No představ si, že jedeš v tanku a musel bys tahat něco tak těžkého."

Offline Kaylen

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Re:FUN jak ma byt
« Odpověď #5219 kdy: 19.03 2014, 23:38:52 »
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WTF .. xD

Jak se tam nakonci lekne ty lepenky ? :DDD too je moc :D

Jo tohle byla brutalita :D